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[Apr. 28th, 2011|08:50 am] |
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I dreamed that a sociopath obsessed with Tyler Durden was ruining my life and trying to kill me- opening up gas leaks in my mom's house, that kind of stuff- so to get away from him I got in a car full of roller derby girls and went on tour with them. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 11th, 2011|05:16 pm] |
All I want to do is listen to music that sounds like this and read things like this. Like I was listening to that song and went "whoa the lyrics go 'keep breathing/keep searching" and then I was like "I should get 'keep breathing' tattooed on one forearm and 'keep searching' on the other one" but then I was like, "wait, fuck searching, all this searching is making me feel exhausted and fucked up," so I thought maybe I should make "let go of searching, let go of breathing" into my motto, because, y'know, "stop breathing" is a shitty motto.
Maybe if I did a hundred tarot readings or meditated so hard I got unstuck in time?
Actually the problem is just that I'm broke which means I'm stressed about money pre-emptorily and then there are all these other things stressing me out on top of that like complicating each other at a geometric rate. How vague. To wit:
-family
-work
-school
-money
-addiction
-clothes (I don't have a whole pair of jeans right now #SYNECHD)
-sleep
-sex
-trust
It is basically a list of the most popular nouns.
Also there is a cardinal who keeps trying to get into the hallway window and Alex's window which makes me think maybe the cardinal isn't my omen but maybe since the hallway is a common area it isan omen for everyone. Bye |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 31st, 2011|02:04 pm] |
Wow this can of Budweiser I found in the refrigerator in the basement of the bookstore tastes exactly like being 18 in the summer in New Jersey! |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 27th, 2011|02:12 pm] |
This thing keeps happening lately where, like, themes are immediately called back to me in conversation in ways that make me want never to interact with humans again. It's frustrating because I'd like not to be angry sometimes! Like, about a week ago, I was explaining to someone that I'm a little reluctant to try to get involved with the queer community here because I've been burned so many times in the past by clueless, unintentionally fucked up queer communities, and the person I was talking to responded with exactly the same kind of self-serving, marginalizing bullshit I had been trying to call out a single sentence earlier- while he was in my house, two days before my birthday. Or today, somebody I work with made a joke/allusion involving Michael Stipe, gay sex and AIDS, which made me feel less sad that he has already quit this job and will not be working here in a week- and then two hours later a customer bought a copy of Borrowed Time, by Paul Monette- this brutal, sad memoir about losing his partner to AIDs in the eighties- that has been sitting on the shelf for like five months, since I bought it for the store.
Thanks, universe, for keeping those lessons coming. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 23rd, 2010|09:49 pm] |
Man, I wish you could see the way it looks here right now, in all this moonlight. It's seriously amazing. Last night was the harvest moon, and also the equinox, which Alex said only happens once every twenty years or something, and it was just so bright I wanted to walk around all night, lounge on the dock listening to the waves and reading this Israel Regardie book of esoteric Qabbalah I'm all obsessed with right now. Alex came and hung out on the dock with me for a while, which was awesome. I don't know if you can picture it, but we've been staying in the barn on a chunk of property that's been in Alex's family for generations, up on the shore of a big ol' lake toward the top of a mountain in New Hampshire. The stupid leaves are just starting to turn and outside at night right now it looks like an episode of a TV show they filmed in the daytime and then stuck under a blue filter to pretend that it's night. I dunno, a photograph can't do it justice, and describing it isn't really getting at it, so you're just going to have to trust me that I wish you were here.
Also I got Pants a turtle costume today. Best ten bucks I ever spent. I'd show you a picture but they keep coming out too dark. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 14th, 2010|09:14 pm] |
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I am staying with a couple in their twenties and their four year old during September, in a little room in their house. I've been mostly coming and going at night, but today after work and interviewing a potential housemate (looking for houses and housemates and houses is hell) I came home when the four-year old was awake. He got super pumped to meet me, stormed into the room where I'm staying, and started showing me the features: the light switch, the lamp, my clothes, a guitar strap in a box next to a bag of syringes, my shoes, a cup of water I'd left on the floor the night before, the noisy air mattress inflater, my shoebox full of underwear. It's funny how that'd be really annoying if some ebullient or coked-out hipster did it, unless the hipster was four. |
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| Burger King |
[Sep. 10th, 2010|07:39 pm] |
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Dude so today? I did a bad job of having any food in my belly, whatever, it happens. So I got all food panicky and went to the Burger King drive-through, because at the Burger King drive -through they have a veggie burger thing that I always used to get after triumphant Angela Chase shows. So I got one, okay, and it was awesome- like better than the ones on the west coast- but who cares, it was also from Burger King it was also gross. The POINT of my story is that this poor girl who was working in the drive-through, right, she opened the window to take my money and I thought at first she just had some big, badass and ostentatious, like, matching nose- and eyebrow rings the color of blue painter's tape. I was like, sweet, that is the kind of teenage decision that is awesome for its willfulness, not its aesthetic success! Then I realized that, actually, it just was blue painter's tape, covering what I assume were a normal nose ring and a normal eyebrow ring, because when you work at the Burger King drive-through you are maybe not allowed to have those things in your face? Poor kid. I hope she grows up, gets out of there and kills a bunch of people. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 22nd, 2010|09:47 am] |
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The last two are Birdsmilk and Words Don't Work, which was the last one we made up and then the first one we ever made up. ( the end! ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 22nd, 2010|09:39 am] |
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Here are You're Not Writing[,] You're Typing, Jordan Can't Read, and Kim. ( lj cut ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 22nd, 2010|08:59 am] |
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Here are the lyrics to "Consent," too. It's about when the cops beat up Sonya (and then didn't get in trouble) because Alicia was riding her bike on the sidewalk. I think I might write out all the lyrics to all these songs, so I don't forget 'em.( Imogen's lj revival continues! ) |
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